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Hi! Welcome to Vertigo's Fun House. Here, you'll find write-ups on unsolved mysteries, riffs of creepypastas/fanfiction, and more. Thanks for stopping by! It means a lot.

Saturday, January 5, 2019

Conspiracy Corner 1: Nibiru

Artists representation of Activision-Blizzard stocks ever since Diablo: Immortal's announcement.

Hello, dear reader! Welcome to my new blog series: Conspiracy Corner. This is one of two new series that will make up the content you see on here—the other coming at a later time this month.

Conspiracy Corner is where we’ll take a look at, well, conspiracies with as little bias as possible. I make no promises that I won't say something biased or that I won't cite a biased source at some point. Besides that, I'll be covering everything from well known theories to some lesser known ones. That said, there are theories that I'll be avoiding for extremely political reasons. I won't name them, but just know that they're minefields of controversy and the last thing I need is a potential flamewar erupting here.

The last thing I wish to make clear is that this series is not dedicated to strictly debunking or spoon feeding you confirmation bias. While I will give my own opinion[s] at times, with the closing thoughts including my overall opinion on the conspiracy itself, I'm not here to feed you what you want to see. This series is, by and large, dedicated to telling you about the conspiracy and then discussing what I’ve personally read about it in my research and studying of it. What you do with the information that I present is for you and you alone to decide. Disregard it if you believe that the theory is as you’ve personally heard it is or let it dictate what path you opt to go down in the way of believing or disregarding the theory.

With all of that said, I feel there's no better way begin a conspiracy-centric series than with the legendary and infamous Nibiru.



Also known as “Planet X”, Nibiru is the brainchild of an author named Zecharia Sitchin. Although the concept of large celestial bodies beyond Neptune are nothing new, Sitchin's 1976 book “The Twelfth Planet” is special. Through a combination of a Sumerian seal and his own translation of the Sumerian language (their cuneiform to be exact), Sitchin came to the conclusion that the Sumerians knew our Solar System was home to twelve planets. Exactly what planets ten and eleven are, I'm not sure, but planet twelve is Nibiru; a planet with an orbital period of 3,600 years and that has life on it.

Named “Anunnaki” by the Sumerians, Sitchin claims that these hyper advanced beings were considered to be “gods” in the eyes of the Sumerian people. Sitchin states that the Anunnaki visited Earth about 450,000 years ago and through genetic engineering, created humans.

Sitchin basically wrote Prometheus before Ridley Scott even made Alien.

The reason for these beings making us puny humans—through female apea mind you—was that the Anunnaki desired gold. Thus, we were their slaves. Then, for reasons I can't seem to find, they left Earth and attempted to destroy us via a flood. But in spite of being capable of making sapient life, the Anunnaki failed and will return one day to finish us off.

Sitchin's claim, both back then and nowadays, received an extremely large amount of criticism. While I don't dive into all of it (I'll leave a link to a website that does at the end of this however), I'll skim over it.

For starters, Sitchin's translations of Sumerian writing was lambasted for being poorly done at best and a complete desecration of the language at worse. His biggest crime in the eyes of historians was simple: Sitchin relied on his own translations and his alone. This allowed him to have what was written mean what he wanted it to say over what it did say.

Ancient and dead languages are one of the most well researched and well documented parts of human history. The Sumerian, Mayan, Aztec, and Latin languages were and still are studied by historians day in and day out. Sitchin's translations weren't verified by any historian and when they were, they laughed it out of their offices and out into space where the Anunnaki likely would've used it to mine gold on Haumea.

The second thing is the one that causes the Nibiru theory to implode like a dying star. It is, was, and always will be scientifically and physically impossible.

Where as the ridiculously successful Hollywood series The Fast and the Furious are often said as being the nightmares the laws of physics have, Nibiru are the fever night terrors that they'd have. Nibiru's orbit is said to run through the inner solar system—though where exactly it goes for 3,600 years, I can't say. Regardless, the alleged orbit of Nibiru is where Sitchin's claim has, and continues to, fall apart.

So, case closed, right? Nibiru isn't possible; all evidence points to that. Nobody would possible continue to push it. Well, this is humanity and we seem to love ourselves a good beating of a dead horse. We also love rebooting and redesigning our dead horses so that we can push them into the public eye and selling them as being alive. So it was that roughly twenty years after Sitchin's book, along came Nancy Lieder; a woman who claims that she was abducted by Grey Aliens (called “Zetas”) from the Zeta Reticuli. According to Lieder, the Zeta's frequently contacted her via an implant in her brain, and that they'd personally chosen her to warn humanity of the impending doom that Nibiru would cause.

Said doom involved Nibiru coming close to Earth, causing it to to stop rotating, the poles to physically flip (due to magnetic interference in the Earth's core), the crust moving and everyone dying like it's a Roland Emmerich movie. Mind you, she didn't account for how Earth would be pulled into Nibiru when the latter was four times the size of the former.

Lieder set up a website called ZetaTalk that's become her base of doomsaying operations. People have also sent her their supposed photographs of Nibiru, most of which are either lens flares or other identifiable objects. At some point, a date of May, 2003 was set for humanity to be wiped out, only to be delayed due to space traffic. Prior to this, Lieder said for people to euthanize their pets as she had (she said she had her dog put down due to it acting aggressively). When asked why the date was disregarded, Lieder said it was a “white lie” to “fool the establishment”. She refuses give the real date for fear of martial law being imposed by the world's governments and inevitably looking like a complete fool.

And thus ends the history of Nibiru; a planet with a sordid history and one that continues to be in the public eye. Now normally, I'd have a theories section here like I did during my “Decemystery” mini series—and I do intend to keep that tradition more often than not. However, due to many of Nibiru's theories being more or less the same thing, I instead want to take the opportunity to dissect Nibiru and go over the various theories more organically. So, let's just discuss Nibiru as a whole.

As a planet, Nibiru is believed to be anywhere between the size of our Moon and the size of Jupiter. Some claim it's a rocky planet, while others say it's a gas giant. As said before, it's believed to have an extremely long orbit—and a very eccentric one at that. As a result, we've never been able to detect it. Some, however, claim that Nibiru is merely hiding behind the Sun. We’ll expand on this later, but I'll spoil now that there's never been a satisfying explanation that clarifies why it's always out of our view.

Exactly what Nibiru's said to do isn't fully agreed upon and for what reason, I can't say for certain. However, the claims that I'm aware of are as follows:

  1. Nibiru will directly impact Earth and wipe out all life.
  2. Nibiru will pass by Earth and the Moon, thus causing a geomagnetic reversal, which will lead to Extinction Level Event. If your brain hurts just from reading that, you've seen nothing yet.
  3. Nibiru will pass between Earth and the Moon, and cause asteroids to rain down on Earth. This won't cause Earth's rotation to be monumentally screwed up though.
  4. Nibiru will herald in the End of Days a la the Book of Revelation.
  5. Nibiru will be trailed by aliens. Whether or not the planet will cause any damage varies.
  6. Nibiru's presence will decimate Earth's magnetic field and we'll all be cooked alive medium-rare.
  7. Nibiru will usher in the New World Order and do nothing because reasons.
  8. Nibiru steals our Moon and we won't have a Moon anymore because physics.
  9. Nibiru sideswipes Earth and we all die, but Nibiru survives because that's how physics works.
  10. Nibiru will steal your wife and kids.
  11. Last but not least, Nibiru just passes by and nothing happens. Some small space rocks would rain down, while others don't.

Although these these theories all have their homes among Nibiru believers, the most commonly agreed upon one is that Nibiru will strike Earth; a close second being it'll pass by Earth, but still cause extreme damage. No matter what you believe though, the story is always the same. There's weird weather going on, the magnetic poles are funky, someone sees something in the sky, someone took a picture of the sun and there's a companion next beneath it, and a plethora of other odd claims. This then makes it to a YouTube video or something else; many of which follow a very similar pattern.

  1. The narrator either uses a text-to-speech program or is extraordinarily dramatic in their delivery.
  2. The individual says they've either been tracking Nibiru with their telescope in their backyard; a telescope that likely cost then $19.99 at Walmart.
  3. The individual cites the Holy Bible out of context and says that proves Nibiru is going to turn us all to ash.
  4. The individual says they've had dreams of Nibiru—not realizing that one's dreams usually has something to do with what they did or have been thinking about. This doesn't phase them in spite of their life centering on Nibiru 24/7/365.
  5. The video is accompanied by Lux Aeterna like music because that's really fitting. Also, Clint Mansell should sue.

These videos average in length between two minutes to upwards of twenty. They're usually clickbait and regurgitate the same talking points of “Nibiru is real, it's just being hidden” and Biblical verses that amount to nothing because their framing has been stripped and repurposed to fit a planet and the theories that surround it and not the life of Jesus. For comparison: if I make a theory that George R.R. Martin is a Terminator and I take lines from George Orwell's “Animal Farm” to back my claim up, does that lend credibility or credence to what I've said? No, I've applied one of history's greatest works of literature and applied it to my half-baked theory that a fantasy author is a killer robot. But hey, given enough time, it may catch on.

And catch on Nibiru did. In fact, it may very well be the most well known apocalyptic theory bar none, let alone one of the most wl conspiracy theories—beaten out only by The Assassination of John F. Kennedy, The New World Order, and 9/11 Truth, though that one is debatable depending on who you're talking to. Regardless, Nibiru's rise to fame came in the form of the “2012 phenomenon”; something that is best described as Y2K but for the internet age.

There were many, many factors to the 2012 fiasco, from the Mayan Calendar to the Yellowstone caldera. At the heart of it all though was Nibiru. December 21, 2012 was the day it'd arrive. There was no denying it: 12/21/12 was the end. No hope; we were all doomed. This doomsday theory made international headlines—and is still cited as the epitome of a doomsday theory gaining a life of its own. The only other one I can think of that's more prominent is the Revelation 12 sign that I'll go over some day.

I digress though. December 21, 2012 came and went. Nothing happened save for the winter solstice and life went on. Anxiety, panic, and fear got the better of many and still does in spite of dozens upon dozens of books having been printed about the Mayan Calendar and why we should believe it to be the one true prophecy.

Yet, despite all of that, almost a decade later: nothing was learned. A person makes a flashy and, at face value, convincing prediction for some date, throws some Biblical verses in there, it gets reported by some media outlets of questionable reputation (I'm looking at you Daily Mail, Daily Express, and Daily Star), and mass panic ensues. A good example of this is when a Christian numerologist named David Meade predicted Nibiru would kill us all on September 23, 2017. This was also the date of the Revelation 12 sign that came and went in spite of an insurmountable level of excitement.

That said, let's move on. Nibiru isn't strictly a planet of some sort. To some, it's more than a planet.

And the name of the star is called Wormwood: and the third part of the waters became wormwood; and many men died of the waters, because they were made bitter.

Revelation 8:10–11


In some videos, it’s claimed that Nibiru isn’t really Nibiru (for the lack of a better way to put it), but that it is instead the astronomical body from the final book of the Bible, Revelation, known as “Wormwood”. As a quick disclaimer: religious theories are a touchy subject and I'm aware that by discussing one, it may come across like I'm trying discredit the religion. I'm not—I myself am Catholic. The fact of the matter here is that the Wormwood theory and Nibiru have often been one in the same. So, do bear in mind that I mean no disrespect.

That said: it's stated when Wormwood passes by Earth, the waters are to become bitter. Interpretations of Wormwood range from the Preterist view that it was a bypassing comet during the Roman siege of Jerusalem in AD 70, with the bitter waters being from the rivers having been filled with the blood of the dead, to a small planet that will pass near Earth during the End Times. In this case, “Nibiru”.

Now, Revelation, like much of the Bible, is interpretive. You can read it and make up your own mind as to what it all means, and Revelation is one that has caused a lot of controversy. Its enigmatic writing and tonal contrast to the rest of the New Testament is something that has lead some to outright not bother reading it due to its content. Wormwood is one of many aspects of this. The idea of an entire planet passing Earth is apocalyptic imagery turned up to 11, but I’m not here to discuss the psychological aspects of the Bible. So, let’s move on.

The theory of Wormwood suffers much of the same problems as Nibiru, with the physics and the scientific aspects, though backers of the Wormwood interpretation (if you will) of Nibiru have something that the other theories mentioned (and that will be mentioned) don’t have: belief/faith. While religion and science are generally conceived as being opposites, they have had their moments where they’ve gotten along. As you may have guessed: not so with Wormwood.

Although there is always the possible retort that Wormwood is an object that God himself will manifest when the time comes, Revelation strictly states that one is not supposed to add or take away from the text that is written. To add in that Wormwood will be “created” when the time comes is to defy that. Basically, as it is written, Wormwood is a planet, star, or in some cases, an angel. While I myself am a Full Preterist and believed that Revelation was fulfilled back in AD 70 when Nero had his army burn Jerusalem to the ground, I cannot sway the views of those who view Wormwood as an impending event. Faith is a very powerful thing and it’s difficult to take that away from someone. I just urge people to not drink water should Wormwood one day bypass Earth. Don’t say John didn’t warn you.

While the idea/theory that Wormwood may or may not be hogwash, there’s one thing that is more definitive and that’s that Nibiru is not a planet, but instead a brown dwarf star. Simply put: this theory is even more absurd and irrational than Nibiru being a planet. To add insult to injury, there are variations of this theory that state that Nibiru is either the planet orbiting the brown dwarf or that the star has an entire solar system orbiting it. The latter of those variations opens an entire can of worms that even the most inexperienced astronomer could tell you as to why it's absolute hogwash. I myself once wanted to be an astronomer, so allow me—someone whose grasp of physics and the like is atrocious—to do just that.

Brown Dwarf stars, while they may have the word “dwarf” in their name, are by no means dwarves in the way we may see them portrayed in fiction such as Lord of the Rings. No, instead, they are dwarves by the standards of a star. You see, a Brown Dwarf star is roughly 15-75 times the size of Jupiter and can have a temperature of 2800 kelvin (or 4,508 degrees Fahrenheit/2,486 Celsius). Simply put: if Nibiru were a Brown Dwarf and it was headed our way, Earth would be ready to get scorched, if not already be too hot for any plants to grow or for humans to survive.

Now, some argue that this is why global warming is occurring; that we are seeing the effects of Nibiru getting close and that things are only going to get worse. This is absolute nonsense. Don’t take my word for it, but if Nibiru were drawing close, we wouldn’t be having winter as we know it. There’s absolutely no way that a Brown Dwarf can waltz into our inner solar system without Earth experiencing a radical temperature shift. Mind you: I’m also leaving out the other reasons that I’ve mentioned above if another large celestial body were to enter the inner solar system. If you’ve forgotten, it amounts to all of us freezing to death because we’d be really far from the Sun.

Moving on though, one of the strangest Nibiru conspiracies is one I’ve wanted to talk about for a very, very long time. It also happens to be a nightmarishly long one, so bear with me here. It states that Nibiru is being hidden by NASA thanks to something called “Project Blue Beam” and is behind the sun. The reason it hasn't pulled us into its gravitational pull (or at least the Moon) varies. Some say it's because the laws of physics and gravity are all made up, while others claim the Moon has actually been destroyed and what we see is a hologram made by Blue Beam. This theory also states that the world's elite are having bunkers built in preparation for the impact because that's how impacts of this magnitude would work.

If you thought the idea that Nibiru wasn't here yet was laughable, then I'm sorry if reading the rundown to this theory made your brain stop working. Alas, we must persist and I’m sorry to that it isn't going to get any easier, so buckle up because we're in it for the long haul.

The idea behind Project Blue Beam is one that was directly lifted from an episode of Star Trek, yet remains an incredibly popular conspiracy among many. Likewise, its application to Nibiru is a popular one in the world of Blue Beam believers. In the realm of Nibiru believers, I'm unsure. While both are regarded as little more than bunk, putting the two together usually results in heartburn. My point is: this theory is nonsense and we'll get to Blue Beam over the summer.

Moving on from that rabbit hole (which we’ll be headed back down later this year), a more fun and certainly unique proposition as to what Nibiru is is that it is neither a planet nor a star, but rather an alien spaceship; a Death Star of sorts that's more planet than machine.

As Sitchin stated earlier: the Anunnaki were to come back because they failed to flood the Earth a la the Old Testament (which I can’t figure out if he directly stole the story of Noah’s Ark from the Bible or if he somehow managed to coincidentally make a ridiculously similar story to that) and kill us all a la the End Times from the Book of Revelation. Okay, on second thought, he absolutely did steal those stories.

Anyways, the issue with this theory really isn’t that it can be disproved so much as that it’s a gridlock. Aliens are something that humanity cannot prove nor disprove. The universe is big—bigger than anything one can feasibly think of. If humans were the only intelligent life in it, then that’s quite the waste of space. Likewise however, we can’t prove that life exists out there. Common sense may dictate it does, but who knows where and how far away they are. That said: the idea of an alien invasion is something that is extremely difficult to both brush off or accept as reality.

If Nibiru were an alien ship, then exactly how it was morphed throughout time into a planet and star is beyond me. Still, it’s great to know that George Lucas was ahead of his time in predicting how we’d all die. Through iconic movie machines turned urban legends.

So while alien invasions/ships are something that science can’t quite disprove, something it can disprove is that Nibiru being yet another kind of star. More specifically: a Neutron star. If you aren't familiar with what a Neutron star is: it's the remnant of a star and a teaspoon of it would weights much as Mount Everest. They're very dense—just like this theory.

Considering that Neutron stars have about 1.4 times the mass of the Sun, yet all of that mass is compacted into something that's about the size of a small City, there's absolutely no reason anyone shouldn't be able to detect one. Not to mention that their magnetic field is absurdly powerful—so powerful in fact that some Neutron stars because Magnetars. Don't even get me started if there's a theory that Nibiru is one of those, otherwise there won’t be a blog left as I’ll probably be dead.

So what is the truth behind Nibiru/Planet X? Well, in my opinion, it doesn't exist. There are an incredible number of holes and flaws to be found, though I don't think it's implausible that there may be another planet waiting to be discovered in our solar system. That said, I don't believe that it's a rogue planet that's going to kill us all. The fact of the matter is that hiding something like Nibiru is impossible to do. The way it's described is ridiculous and the number of contrivances required for everything to work staggering—even by the standards of your average space-centric conspiracy. I am aware that at the start of this blog, I said that this series wouldn’t be dedicated to debunking theories and I do apologize that I went against that. Nibiru is a theory that has been debunked by many astronomers and while I could’ve set it off to the side for a later date, I want it to play a role in this series’ history. Namely, that it’s the ying to what the second entries yang will be: a conspiracy theory that has evidence to back its claims up. So, do know that what I said at the start will hold true, but it didn’t hold true here. Go figures that I’d be the one to have to say that.

All of that said: the Nibiru theory does raise a very interesting question. If the governments of the world knew that a killer asteroid were to strike the Earth, would it be announced or hidden? That's something we'll be covering sometime later this year, but for now, that's all I have to say on Nibiru. I personally label this conspiracy as being nonsense, but I invite you to make up your own mind—though if you do believe in Nibiru, I encourage you to look at things from the perspective of a skeptic. There is a reason Nibiru hasn't killed us all throughout the years. Trust me.

2 comments:

  1. This whole conspiracy is all kinds of nuts, and laughably so. Enough said.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Tyler "Bio" RodriguezJanuary 6, 2019 at 10:03 PM

    Yeah this is some extreme insanity. I don't know a single person that believes this and thank god. Also I'm pretty sure this inspired that Lars Van Trier movie Melancholia.

    ReplyDelete